Published: January 19, 2019
Mirror, Mirror… on the Wall
All it takes is a word. Something small but grand. Something loud and profound.
All it takes is a glimmer. A glimmer of hope. A glimmer of love. A speckle of yourself that you’ve never seen before.
Mirror, mirror… on the wall – whose the fairest of them all?
Stretching awake, I peeled my eyes open as my hand simultaneously crashed down onto my old brown alarm clock. It was the same routine every morning since I was in the fifth grade. Yep! The ulgy old thing seemed to work much better than the options technology has provided over the years. I’m not sure if it’s the tradition that my Grandmother started me on years ago or if it’s the fact that no matter how many times I’ve heard this sound I can’t seem to sleep in past the nerve wrecking noise that blast through my eardrums with no remorse for my peace and comfort. The sun peeked through the blackout curtains I’d hung to enjoy those mid-day naps, the birds chirped as they sat on the branches outside my window. The greeting was welcomed as I knew with these commonalities God had blessed me with a new day.
Peeling myself from the comfort of my plush sheets and pillow top mattress my body staggered towards the place that I entered each morning to begin my day. The first task threatened to leave my body as I quickly made a dash for my seating. I sat, releasing a much needed breath as I simultaneously leaned over to turn on the shower.
Rising from my seat, I wiped a smear off the mirror and looked at myself at the start of the day. This small detail was one of the most important during my morning routine. This was something I’d been sure to incorporate into my daily life to remind myself never to forget what I looked like each day, to reflect on how I’ve changed each day, to marvel over how I acquire a new level of beauty and expertise every day.
As I peered into the details of I noticed a twinge of something different. Something appeared that I’d never seen before. It appeared in the rim of my eyes, in the dimples in my cheeks, and within the lines of my smile. I’d always been bright and bubbly but this was a genuine smile. This was a different smile. The girl looking back at me wasn’t the girl I grew up knowing but rather the girl I remembered.
The child that ran free and wild into the arms of my grandmother. The girl who spent countless hours riding a bike and roughhousing with the fellas. The girl who was always socially awkward with those among my age group but the social butterfly in crowds decades older. The girl who was loud and boisterous and didn’t care to chime it down. The girl who built igloo’s with her brothers and climbed trees far taller than she could remember. See, this girl didn’t look like me….
She looked – looked like who I use to be, who I’ve been searching for, who I wanted to be…
One ripple. One wave. One conversation. One interaction.
It happened over the last few weeks.
The transformation of my eyes, ones that had forgotten about hope. The transformation of my beliefs; finally freeing myself from the captivity of normalcy while entering the depths of the unknown and endless possibilities. The confidence to grab a hold to the freedom of living and believe in my dreams.
God was able to show me everything about me, that I’d forgot I was meant to be. It started with the
What’s special is that God aligned everything so perfectly that even if I wanted to revert back to the things of my past, I couldn’t. The very blessing he’d given me to impact all those around me had become suffocated in the place I was currently in.
“Smile. You haven’t been lately.”
Those words alone sealed any deals or second guessing I could have had. The wrong place for me had stolen a piece of me that I hadn’t realized disappeared. In the midst of God revealing who I am, he revealed where he wants me to be, what my purpose is and how I can help change this world.
Perhaps that is why when I walked past that mirror, and looked deep into my soul – all I could see was a stranger staring back at me. God had revealed Me to Me and I finally felt free to be just who he called me to be.